Often times it’s the people who think, talk, and act like us who understand who we are and where we come from. As intuitive as this idea may appear many of us make the mistake of assuming the rest of society goes through our same thought process when making various decisions.
As a result we find ourselves in front of a bevy of issues: miscommunication, dissension, indifference, etc…the list goes on. In a world of so many different personalities and leanings it can become exhausting to engage in communication (granted I contend in the previous article this contrast is what makes us human; it actually becomes necessary to engage different backgrounds and cultures, but for this point we shall carry on).
In light of this disconnect, it can be safe to say sometimes we need a friend just like us. For mere moments we can consider and sift through our words and thoughts as the friend, who is just like us, conveys them. Are we making sense? Are the beliefs and values my like-minded friend and I share sensitive and life giving to the people around us? These buddies can be a mirror of reflection of consideration and awareness. It’s these same friends who allow us to have almost an out of body experience and ultimately become more self-aware of our good and bad qualities.
So in the spirit of self-awareness and avoiding destructive narcissism, here a few reasons why you might need a friend just like you:
1. They grant us validation: Normally validation isn’t so great, but for the few moments validation is necessary having a friend just like you is extremely helpful. It’s when we experience instances of faltering confidence that a friend just like us can come in and provide the needed reassurance to help allow us to move forward. Plus, they let us know we aren’t too crazy; it’s sometimes helpful to have a friend just like you who is older or more mature because they’ve been where you are and can give advice accordingly
2. They are a helpful aid for self-awareness: There have been times where I observe the friends just like myself and think, “wow, I was just thinking that”. Usually one of two things occur in that moment. I either think of how amazing and profound the same thought I processed was spoken by another human being so similarly or I think how I can make an improved adjustment for myself on what was just said. The goal for self-awareness is to pursue balance and beneficial action for the rest of society; the friend just like us gives us a mirror to grant us a reflection of how we may be and perhaps how we can make a beneficial adjustment towards greater development.
3. They’re fun: Let’s be honest, having a friend just like ourselves is thrilling and adventurous. It’s like the twin we never got to have. In the spirit of the ride or die friend we can experience the thrill of solidarity with buddies just like us and experience, if for a brief moment, beautiful harmony. The natural flow of relationship that comes with the friend just like us allows us to experience a light and easy exchange of love; when we are with friends like ourselves we can experience poetry in motion and friendship freely given.
These are just a few reasons of why we may need a friend just like us!
*disclaimer, it’s our natural propensity that brings us to people just like ourselves. The Bible regards like-mindedness and unity as cornerstones for godly, wonderful community. The idea I like to offer to my peers is to find friends like ourselves; likewise, we are given the privilege of sharing that same, easy love with the people around us. A godly love always invites and includes others where it’s easy to engage with one another. Just a reminder for you and I to not settle at the idea of community, but allow our love for one another to burst into a world that needs it more than ever.